


so much closer

by loafers



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-14
Updated: 2013-12-14
Packaged: 2018-01-04 15:42:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1082799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loafers/pseuds/loafers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>luke gives michael a hand losing his v card</p>
            </blockquote>





	so much closer

**Author's Note:**

> anon requested clemmings first time as a follow up to a [virgin!michael ficlet](http://cyclotomic.tumblr.com/post/69061127265/clemmings-secretly-a-virgin) i wrote. this is way longer than i intended! 
> 
> title is from death cab's transatlanticism.
> 
> warnings for unprotected sex, lots of squishy love feelings, and i guess luke's underage (17) in some places in the world idk.

Michael doesn't really think of himself as a virgin. Like, he's not. He's made people come and they've made him come. He's fingered girls, made them come on his tongue, sucked dick, and gives a mean handjob. Why does everything have to hinge on whether or not he's put his dick in someone? Michael just really loves sex, loves pleasing people, making someone feel good. He loves kissing and touching and licking and grinding, and he's sure he'd love fucking too, but there's literally _so_ many other options.

“But don't you like, want it?” Luke asks shyly. His cheeks and tips of his ears are flushed pink. It could be because of what they're talking about, or it could be the beer. Either way it's cute, and Michael can't help smiling at him. 

“I guess?” Michael shrugs and takes another sip of beer. He's got a dull buzz going, enough to make things a little woozy at the edges if he turns his head too quick, or closes his eyes. 

Michael's status as Last Virgin In The Band has been a frequent topic of conversation with Luke over the last week or so since Michael had accidentally blurted that he'd never got it in before. Luke's cute about it, eyes darting checking corridors before he presses close and presses Michael for information about where his dick's been, or hasn't as the case may be. It's kind of intensely inappropriate, but Michael hasn't pulled Luke up on it yet. He kind of likes it. Which... is something he's purposefully tried to avoid thinking about too hard. Talking about sex with your mates is normal, talking about this is different. It feels intimate. 

“It's all I could think about with Aleisha,” Luke says and then blushes redder and looks down at his lap, at his fingers picking at the label on the beer bottle. “Before we did it,” he mumbles. Michael knows Aleisha was Luke's first. Luke's first everything, really. 

“Really?” Michael nudges Luke with his elbow, he can't help it, he's so easy to tease. “Thought it was all magic and roses with you two, true love and shit.” 

Luke rolls his eyes, shifts his position on the couch and ends up closer to Michael, their arms brushing. “It was, but like, that's part of it. You know.” Luke pauses, eyes flicking up to Michael's. He looks flustered. “Being that close to the person you love.” Luke's voice is small, his lips barely moving as he mumbles it, self-conscious. Michael should laugh at him, make fun. He should, but he doesn't. 

Michael nods. “I guess,” he says. “I guess I've just never been in love like that.” 

They're both quiet for a moment, and Michael spends the silence thinking about all the people he's done sexy things with who he wasn't in love with and is just starting to feel kind of gross about it when Luke speaks up, “I dunno if I was in love with her.” 

Luke sounds casual but it's a pretty big statement, almost a confession. Almost as shocking to Michael as his virginity seemed to have been to Luke. 

Michael's always been jealous of the kind of thing Luke and Aleisha had together. Michael's not good at being a girl's boyfriend and he's been too scared to be a boy's boyfriend just yet. He just can't get it right, where the boundaries are supposed to lie, what the difference is between best friends and more than that. There's a reason most of his sexual experiences have been in friends with benefits kind of situations. Aleisha and Luke seemed to get it right. They were best friends, but there were a couple too. The whole thing escapes Michael, really, whatever it is he's doing wrong, whatever he's missing. 

“Really?” He asks carefully. 

Luke shrugs but doesn't say anything because he's too busy tipping his beer up to drain the very last of it. Michael watches Luke's throat, long and pale, but strong, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallows. He lowers the bottle, long fingers on the neck of it, and wipes his mouth on his wrist. “I don't know. I loved her, but,” Luke shrugs again, and sets his empty bottle on the floor, slumps back on the couch, shoulder bumping Michael's, rolls his head to the side to look up at Michael. 

Michael feels a little betrayed. Everything he knows about relationships is based on two things; his mum and dad's marriage and Luke being in love with Aleisha. 

“I loved her the same as I love you,” Luke says. Michael frowns. “And Cal, and Ash. Like best friends, I guess,” he adds quickly and shrugs again. He's shrugging a lot. Strikes Michael as defensive, unsure. 

“You love,” Michael swallows. He feels hot and confused and a little drunker than he did a minute ago. Luke probably has the best idea, so Michael throws back the last of his beer too, and settles further back against the couch once his empty's on the ground. “You love us like you loved your girlfriend.” 

It makes sense to him. Kind of. Michael's thought vaguely that if it was possible he'd date his band. Okay, not vaguely. They've all seen each other naked, get along well, can live together, know all of each other's annoying habits, and like, if Michael doesn't wanna hang out there'd be two other people in the relationship too. It'd be a pretty sweet deal. 

“Is that weird?” Luke asks. Michael looks at him, and he's smiling, face close, turned to look at Michael, their shoulders pressed together. 

“No,” Michael says. It's not. Even if the way Luke means it isn't really how Michael means it. Michael's not in love with his band. That's ridiculous. 

“Hm,” Luke hums and squirms, huffing and shifting until he's got his head on Michael's shoulder. 

“Get me another beer,” Michael says, slightly unsettled, just as Luke says, “I'd let you.” 

“What?” Michael asks, but it's too late, Luke's got his hand on Michael's knee, pushing on it to get himself up off the couch, stumbles a bit, and disappears to fetch more beer. 

Michael waits impatiently, and when Luke comes sloping back in, already sipping from his beer, Michael says, “you'd let me what?” 

“Oh,” Luke says, and flops down beside Michael, giggling. Michael takes his beer from him and Luke covers his face, shaking his head a little as he laughs. “I was just thinking. If you wanted to, you know, lose it. Your virginity.” 

Michael breathes in sharply, his mind breathing out _yes_. He voice is strained when he says, “jesus, how drunk are you?” 

Luke shrugs. Michael wants to grab his shoulders to stop him from ever shrugging again. This is no time for nonchalance or ambiguity. “A bit,” Luke says. He takes his hand away from his face and takes a long sip from his beer, watching Michael. “I'd let you.” 

“Who _are_ you,” Michael says, eyeing him suspiciously. 

“I know you're into guys, it can't be that different to fucking a girl.” 

“Um,” Michael says. Luke smiles reassuringly. Michael takes a flustered sip of his beer. “You're straight.” 

“I guess,” Luke says. He seems irritated by it. “It's not like it'd make me gay if,” Luke trails off and Michael laughs. 

“If you let me fuck you in the ass,” Michael finishes for him, his tone flat. 

“Yeah,” Luke says seriously. 

Michael swallows, eyes casting around for something to save him from this conversation. He comes up empty handed. He can't think of a single reason why he'd say no, why he wouldn't want to. He's fucked. Well, Luke is. “Okay,” he says. 

Luke breathes out and then throws back the rest of his beer, Michael watches him for half a second and then he does the same, gulping down over half the bottle in one go. He feels too full once it's empty, swallows and burps and lets it settle in him, feels the courage swell up, any lingering reservations fade away. Yeah, he can fuck Luke. Of course he can. 

He's fooled around with friends before and it's generally gone okay, so the idea shouldn't feel like it does, like it's a big deal. It's not a big deal. It's no bigger deal than if he was just going to suck Luke's dick. They've kissed before and the world kept turning. It's fine, it's simple. They're best mates and Michael trusts Luke not to be weird, just like he knew it wouldn't be weird the first time he kissed him. 

Luke's looking at him, biting at his lip around the piercing. Michael meets his eyes and Luke, Michael swears he sees his hand shake a little bit as he reaches for his fly and undoes the top button. “Do you want me on my back?” 

“Um,” Michael thinks about it but he's lost in the flood of heat to his belly. Luke on his back. Luke naked on his back. Luke naked on his back under Michael with a dick in his ass. _Fuck_. “May-,” Michael stutters, cringes. He's fucking good at this, god damnit. “Maybe we could kiss?” 

“Okay yeah,” Luke says and leans in, hand pressed into the couch cushion between them, Michael tilts his face up and presses his mouth to Luke's. It's clumsy, they're both inhaling, opening their mouths, fitting their lips together wrong. Michael growls and grabs at the back of Luke's neck, pulls him in and Luke just goes slack, lets Michael lead it. Luke tastes like beer, and his mouth feels hot and good. Michael's always liked kissing him, but this feels. Different. Better? Leading to something, which it is. Sex. Michael's going to fuck Luke. Michael moans at the thought, and Luke's tongue slides hot and dirty against his own. 

Luke pulls away. They're both breathing hard already, flushed as much from the beer as arousal now, probably. Michael looks at Luke's eyelashes, his fingers on the back of Luke's neck slipping up to feel at the soft curls at his nape. “Wanna go to bed?” Luke asks. 

“Yeah,” Michael breathes. Luke gets up and Michael notices that his dick is hard in his pants. He's relieved, it's not just him. Luke's never got hard for him before, and Michael wonders if it's from the kissing or from the thought of what they're going to do. It's probably both, like it is for Michael. 

Michael feels weirdly embarrassed of his erection as he stands up, reaches to adjust his dick so it's sitting flatter in his pants but that's worse because then Luke sees, eyes flicking down and catching Michael groping at his crotch. He flushes and Michael likes it, so he keeps his hand there, squeezes at his cock, and Luke looks back up at his face, stumbles when he takes a step forward, presses close against Michael. He's clumsy when he pushes Michael's hand out of the way and palms at Michael's cock himself. Michael swears, surprised, his hips jerking at little under Luke's hand. 

Luke kisses him and Michael only lets it last a moment, tries to guide them towards their room but he's too unfamiliar with the layout, too drunk, so he has to pull away. Luke makes a needy little noise and it makes Michael laugh, grabs Luke's hand without thinking, but it's not like he can just let it go then. They both look at their joined hands, and Michael blushes, gives his hand a tug. “Come on,” he says. 

They're rooming together, because they're always rooming together, and their beds are already pushed together from earlier cuddle parties, which is good, they don't have to decide whose bed is going to get fucked on. 

Michael trips and falls into bed, breathless and dizzy in the dark room. Luke follows him, crawling up his body, spreads out on top of him, body pressed to Michael's as he leans down for another kiss. Michael lets Luke set the pace, it's hard, frantic, Luke kissing him like he might not ever get to kiss someone again, his hands slipping up and then down Michael's sides, shifts himself and then he can get his hand back on the hard shape of Michael dick through his pants. 

Michael gasps. “You seem pretty eager for this,” he says. 

“Shut up,” Luke mumbles. Michael doesn't like being told to shut up. He reaches down, snatches Luke's hands up and Luke's arms go limp in his grip. Michael rolls them over, pins Luke's wrists down and pushes their hips together, has to swallow down his groan at the feeling of Luke's dick nudging his own. 

He pushes up so he can look down where Luke's t-shirt has ridden up, revealing the thin trail of blond hair that leads down below the open fly of his jeans, just the top of his pants peeking out. Michael feels a sudden rush of heat roll through him, licks his lips, hands squeezing at Luke's wrists. He hasn't been with a boy in so long and fuck, he's really missed it. 

“Are you sure you don't just want me to blow you?” Michael asks, his voice dropped low, his mouth fucking watering at the thought of a cock, Luke's cock, in his mouth. 

Luke groans, hips pumping up and knocking into Michael's. Michael snickers. “Just thought,” Luke pants, “wanna help you. Lose your.” Michael likes this useless Luke he's discovered, how he can't even make a sentence. Weirdly, he still understands what Luke means. He wonders if he can make Luke lose his capacity for words all together. 

“Be your first,” Luke adds, and it sounds off to Michael. Luke will be his first. The first person he ever fucked. It's good. It's not like him and Luke are going to have a falling out ever, it'd be bad if you fell out with the person you first fucked, probably. 

Michael wiggles down on top of Luke until Luke spreads his thighs for Michael to fit between, licks at Luke's mouth and Luke parts his lips, turns it into a kiss. Michael can feel the tendons in Luke's wrists flexing under his hands, can feel the tense rise and fall of Luke's chest, the sharp points of his hipbones, the scorching hot press of his hard dick. Michael shudders, rolls his hips down and Luke moans, hitches his leg up, folds it over Michael's hip, trying to draw him tighter in. Michael pants against Luke's mouth, drags his hand down from his wrist, his mouth down from Luke's lips, kisses his throat, nudges Luke's head back to get better access, his hand dragging down Luke's side, fingers pressing into Luke's waist and then hip, and then dipping below the waist of his jeans and pants, pushing them down as he feels at the curve of Luke's thigh, the soft handful of his ass. 

“Fuck,” Luke gasps, squirming, arching up in attempt to rub himself against Michael. 

“How long have you thought about this?” Michael's voice low, breath hot against Luke's throat. “Getting fucked,” he adds and Luke shudders, his thighs shifting, like he's trying to spread wider. 

“No,” Luke gasps. Mumbles, “s'not, not like that.” 

Michael can't take it any longer, not the room he needs in Luke's pants for his hand. Pushes up, on his knees between Luke's legs, reaches down and yanks, pulls Luke's jeans and pants down his thighs, twists around and pulls until Luke helps him get them off completely. Michael's slow about dragging his eyes to where they wanna be, to get a look at Luke's dick when it's all full and hard. 

“Fuck,” he gasps, he can't help it. It kind of hits him with Luke bare from the waist down now, his cock so hard, lying against his belly. Michael's seen it before but never hard, and it's thinner than his own, maybe a little longer, it seems to suit Luke's body, flushed dark, and leaking at the tip already. 

Luke pulls his legs up, purposeful but slow like he's unsure, shy. He spreads his thighs open, shifts to tilt his hips up so, so Michael can see. His pink little hole. Michael shudders, his cock aching, throbbing. He wants it so bad, didn't even realise he would, and it's only made worse when Luke reaches a hand down between his legs, thumb nudging his balls as he strokes down over his hole. 

“Mike,” Luke says, voice a rough drag out of his throat. Michael nods and rolls away, off the bed, stumbling as he shoves his jeans and pants off, kicking them away, tugs his t-shirt off too as he gets to the dresser with his toiletries bag on top, fumbles with the zip to the side pocket where he keeps condoms, lube. 

Comes back to the bed and Luke's totally bare now too, shirt tossed aside. Michael just wants to climb on top of him, press all his naked skin to Luke's, so he does, Luke's arms encircling his shoulders as he settles between Luke's spread thighs. Luke parts his kiss-swollen lips, arching up, so Michael gives him the kiss he's asking for, settling heavy on top of him He sinks into kissing Luke, feeling every bit of it; the soft, warm press of their lips, the stutter of Luke's breath, the heat of his tongue, slick against his own. Michael strokes Luke's cheek and Luke makes a sweet little noise, desperate. 

“I wanna,” Michael breathes, mindless, opens his eyes. It's like he's in a daze, which isn't uncommon for him, hypnotised by the simple thrilling pleasure of another person's mouth and body against his own, but it's thicker this time, it's Luke. He blinks at Luke and buries his face into the crook of his neck, partly to hide, partly to kiss him there too. “Everything,” he mumbles, almost too quiet. It's true. He wants to do everything with Luke, taste him and touch him and make him shake, make him come, every way he can. 

Luke's hand slips up his back, palm open and warm between Michael's shoulder blades, a heavy, eager weight. Michael knows that it's permission, a plea, Luke wants everything too. 

They're both so hard, cocks nestled together between their bodies, lining up, bumping when they shift against one another, sending shocks of pleasure sparkling up Michael's spine, but he almost doesn't care. It's background to the heavy thrum of Luke's heart beating hard in his chest pressed under Michael's. Luke presses his hips up though, pushing his cock against Michael, clutching at him. It's so sweet, even if Michael's the virgin here he knows he's had more sex. 

It occurs to Michael then, a thought that makes Michael stutter to a stop, his breath harsh at the base of Luke's throat. It's not just him, he's never fucked anyone before, but Luke's certainly never _been_ fucked, never even been with a boy. It's both of them and it makes Michael shiver; they're each other's first times. 

Michael kisses Luke, mouth knocking into his hard, kisses him fiercely. Luke moans and it's so sudden, the way Michael just wants in this horrible all-consuming way, he wants Luke so bad, wants to feel what it's like but more than that, he wants to be inside Luke, to be that close, like Luke said. To be that close to someone he loves. 

It's scary in the best way, thrilling, Michael shivers, mumbles, “you really wanna do it?” 

Luke nods immediately, fingers digging into Michael's back, says, “please,” voice breaking. 

“God,” Michael murmurs, hushed, drags himself up a little, enough that he can reach down between them and still see Luke's face, watch it carefully, see every little flutter of his eyelashes, the way his lips part, cheeks flushing darker when Michael presses his thighs further apart and slides his hand up smooth, pale skin to touch him between. 

Luke makes an aborted little whimper, hips jerking at the first touch of Michael's fingers, just the tips of them stroking lightly down between his cheeks, over his hole. Michael glances down, sees the way it makes Luke's cock twitch when he rubs him there, makes him blurt out a little pre-come. It's reassuring to know that it makes him feel good, being touched there. 

“It's better,” Luke gasps, “if you-.” He pushes the lube at Michael. 

“You've done this before,” Michael says faintly and Luke squirms. 

“Only to myself,” he admits. Michael flushes hot, the images of it flashing through his mind, Luke touching himself like this when he jerks off, fingering himself. Michael's hands twitch, unsteady as he gets the lube open, slicks his fingers. 

“You like it?” Michael asks gruffly. He knows the answer, but it feels like Luke's a step ahead now, makes Michael crave the upper-hand back. How can he be the one into dudes here but hasn't ever played with an asshole before? 

“Yeah,” Luke huffs, long legs folded, knee nudging Michael's side impatiently. Michael pushes his slick fingers against Luke's hole, stroking him there, slicking him up, before he applies any real pressure, just one fingertip nudging into him. Luke groans. Michael can't wait to find out what happens when he gets his dick in him. 

He's going slow, not just because he wants to be careful with Luke, but he's so tight, so hot inside, Michael's fascinated, twisting his finger, working it deeper to the first knuckle, feeling how Luke's body clutches at him. He leans back over Luke, kisses him, whispers, “does it hurt?” 

Luke shakes his head. “No, I can take it. More.” 

Michael pushes until he has his finger buried in him before he begins to pull out, sucks on Luke's top lip as he goes back in with two, just as slowly as the very first touch, feeling Luke's body resist and then give for it. Luke's lip trembles against Michael's mouth and then he presses up and kisses him, his fingers twisting in Michael's hair, makes a sweet little noise of need, so Michael sinks his slick fingers into him, opening him up. 

Luke only feels tighter now, hotter, and he's squirming too, working his ass down on Michael's fingers like he means to fuck himself, like he's just that eager for it. Michael can barely believe the squeeze of Luke's body on his fingers, can't let himself even begin to imagine the feeling of it around his dick. It's slick, kind of like a girl, but Michael knows it's just the lube making Luke wet, he can't do that for him, but his fingers slide in and out of Luke with the same slick ease. 

Michael sits back, he wants to see, his wrist between Luke's long, slim thighs, his fingers twisting into him, how pink and slick Luke is where Michael's fingers disappear inside him, buried deep to the last knuckle. Michael spreads his fingers as he pulls out, only a little but it makes Luke's thighs twitch, makes him gasp a little sharp breath. Michael strokes over his hole with the flat of three fingers, and he can feel that Luke wants it, but he looks up at Luke's face to check. Luke nods, biting his lip, his cheeks flushed so red, and then groans when Michael pushes into him with all three fingers. 

“Shit, Luke,” Michael says, awed. It looks hot, dirty, his fingers stroking just inside Luke. It's slower going with three, but he pushes, sinks them into Luke little bit by bit to bury them inside him, feel the overwhelming clutch of heat around them. Luke squirms as Michael fucks him with them, slow and careful, knows he needs to get Luke relaxed, ready for – god, ready to take his dick. 

Michael shivers, voice so deep he almost has to clear his throat to be heard, says, “how does it feel?” He's impatient. He wants Luke to tell him he's ready. He really wants it, now. He never has before. 

“Good,” Luke tells him, sounding breathless. His hips shift restlessly, working his ass on Michael's fingers, his dick twitching against his belly when Michael twists them in a little deeper. “Is it okay?” Luke asks, which takes Michael by surprise. 

“Yeah,” he says, licks his lips, his little finger and thumb pushing at the back of Luke's balls, fingers buried deep. “It's hot,” he says, wants to give Luke the reassurance he's looking for, quell whatever insecurity he's worried about. “You're so tight,” Michael says roughly even though he can feel how the initial pressure's eased a little, how Luke's body is adjusting to having something inside. 

“Do you like that?” Luke asks shyly, blushing and looking away when Michael looks at him, surprised. 

“Yes,” Michael says quickly, doesn't have to think about it for a second. He loves everything about how Luke feels inside. “Feels so good, Lukey, cant wait to fuck you,” Michael says. His voice only wavers on the last two words. 

Luke moans, nods, his hips shifting rhythmically now, fucking himself on Michael's fingers as much as Michael's fucking him with them. “I want it,” Luke pants, kind of like he's been holding it in. Michael pushes his fingers in deep, harder, and Luke chokes on another moan. “Please,” he says, strained, the very edge of desperate. Michael could keep going, he wants to, he wants to make Luke come like this, just his fingers. Wants to make Luke come with his mouth or a hand on his cock too. There's time. 

Michael eases his fingers out of Luke, wiping the slick off them on Luke's thigh as Luke watches him, biting his lip. He reaches for a condom and Luke stops him. “Don't need it,” Luke says and Michael frowns, he knows it's bad to do this without, irresponsible. But it's not like Luke's a _stranger_. He's about to agree when Luke offers a stuttered, “I- I want to feel it. You.” And Michael flushes hot, shivers, his cock throbs. 

He leans down over Luke, abandoning the condom, hovers over him, lips brushing his. “Wanna feel you too,” he says and Luke whimpers, leans up to meet the kiss. His leg curls up over Michael's hip and his hands pulls Michael down. It happens so naturally, how Luke guides him down onto his body, into position, like he's meant to be there, like his cock was made to snub up against Luke's hole. 

Michael can't stop kissing Luke now that he's started again. It's even better this time, Luke clutching at him, panting into his mouth. It's desperate, hot, as hot as the feeling of Luke under him, of his cock slipping over Luke's hole, catching and threatening to push inside. 

“Michael,” Luke says, pulled away but only just, mouth wet against Michael's chin. He reaches down, hands a little damp with sweat, bumping clumsily over Michael's spine, hip, thigh, reaches down between them to take Michael's dick into his hand. “Please,” he says, kisses Michael's chin, his bottom lip, wherever he can reach without moving, both of them frozen in anticipation. 

“Do it,” Michael says roughly, and Luke guides his cock against him just right, his fingers skidding over the length of it, his balls, down to catch around his thigh. Releases a long breath as he pulls at Michael's thigh, guiding him to push his cock inside. 

Michael holds his breath involuntarily. The feeling is so immediate and so intense it's like his whole body refuses to do anything else, focus any tiny bit of energy on anything but feeling this, not even breathing. Maybe even his heart stops. Michael thinks he can only feel one steady heartbeat. Perhaps they've just fallen in sync with each other. He can feel the beat of it around his cock, a hot steady throb, can't tell if it's from inside his own body, the blood pulsing in his hard cock, or if it's from within Luke, hot and squeezing so tight around him. 

Michael pushes in a little further and Luke's breath hitches, his fingers squeeze at the back of Michael's thigh and then his hip when he moves his hand up, using a new grip to urge Michael closer, deeper. Michael can only give Luke what they both need, buries his cock inside him all the way, slow, inch by inch, until Luke's ass fits snug in the curve of Michael's hips. Michael holds the small of Luke's back, supporting him, and shivers when he feels Luke shift, squeezing tight in a little wave up Michael's cock. 

Michael presses a feeble kiss to Luke's mouth, his lips almost trembling. He feels almost weak. The delay before Luke's unsteady answering kiss suggest he's feeling it too, both of them completely overwhelmed, too unprepared for the reality of it. 

“Are you okay?” Michael asks, his voice small, deep, breathless, never heard it sound like that before. 

Luke doesn't answer, just reaches a shaky hand behind Michael's head, draws him down and kisses him hard, open and hot, tongue pushing into Michael's mouth, whimpers when Michael touches his cheek, takes control back, slows it down. He can only take so much even though he wants it all. Luke submits to Michael's leading the kiss though which makes Michael shiver as their lips slide together, slick and open, Michael's tongue dipping in to stroke against Luke's own, a hot filthy feeling. 

Michael shifts his hips forward, surprised by the waves of pleasure just that tiny movement sparks and how it makes Luke moan, all startled like. “I,” Luke gasps, lips moving against Michael's, breathing right into Michael's mouth, “I need-” 

Michael nods, kisses him once more, catching Luke's top lip between his own tenderly. “I know,” he says, pulls away, “me too.” 

Michael takes in the picture of Luke, almost unrecognisable as the Luke he knows and loves now, his hair damp with sweat, pushed back of his forehead, blue eyes dark, cheeks flushed pink, mouth red and swollen from kissing. Michael loves it, loves _him_. He's so beautiful. Michael can't believe he's letting him have this. 

Michael ducks his head, he can't meet Luke's eyes any longer, it's too much. He kisses Luke's throat instead, his collar bone, his shoulder, his hand slipping from Luke's cheek to press against Luke's chest, the other under him still, holding him, helping to hold them together. Luke arches up, squeezes Michael's hip, his long legs folding around Michael's waist, Michael's eyes going wide as he sinks in just that little bit further, shudders and tenses. 

“Fuck,” he gasps, fingers squeezing hard at Luke's back, his chest. He's so close to coming already and he hasn't even. He's inside Luke but they're not _fucking_ , not yet. “Can you come like this?” he gasps. 

Luke nods, shifts his arm from around Michael's shoulders to slip down between them. Michael feels his knuckles against his stomach as he gets his hand on his cock, gives it a squeeze. “Yeah,” Luke breathes. 

“Want you to come first,” Michael says. It's something he's said before, to girls laying on top of him, his face in their cunt, their mouth on his cock, said it to boys too, hands on each other. He means it. He likes to make people come, likes to work for it, likes it even better than coming himself even. It makes sense it's the same now, even though it's his dick in Luke's ass, he needs Luke to love it before he can. 

“Yeah, okay,” Luke breathes, shivery, biting his lip as he gazes up at Michael, shoulder shifting as he strokes himself. “I can if you,” he nudges his forehead against Michael's, their noses bumping, mouth against Michael's again, where it belongs, “fuck me.” 

“Shit,” Michael shivers, hips rolling forward without his even really telling them too, subconscious how his body knows how to give Luke what he wants, how to make him come like this. Gives Luke he's mouth to lick at but only kisses back lazy and distracted as he gathers himself together and begins to fuck Luke. 

It's slow, each shift feels so intense, Luke fever hot, achingly tight on him, but Michael works up to it until he's fucking him in long, deep thrusts, slow but building quicker, and Luke's not even kissing him anymore, just gasping, whimpering into his mouth. 

That's what Michael focuses on, everything else is just a hot, sweet blur of pleasure, but he can see Luke's face, watch him pant, his eyelashes fluttering, no warning when he comes, he just opens his eyes, locks them on Michael's, mouth dropped open as he shivers. Michael feels him tense up, slows his thrusts into him so he can focus on it, really feel Luke coming on his cock, feel the wetness of his come splattering between them. It seems to last for ages before Luke goes lax, arches up for a lazy kiss, and Michael shifts his hips, really need to now, he needs to come so bad. 

“Is it too much?” Michael asks and Luke shakes his head, hitches his hips up to get Michael moving again. So Michael does it, trusts Luke, buries his face against Luke's neck and fucks the orgasm out of himself. He's less coordinated and careful now, short, sharp thrusts, just chases it until it hits him, dazzling and hot. 

Only just manages to push his cock deep before he freezes up with the heat of it, loses himself for a long moment, shuddering on top of Luke, inside him. When he comes back to himself, Luke's stroking his hair. Michael breathes out long and unsteady and kisses Luke's throat before he gets up the guts and the energy to pull back and look Luke in the face. 

When he does, he can't help but kiss him. The feeling of love for him is so intense, there's no choice, he has to get it out or he might just explode. Luke kisses back, but less eagerly, slow and sweet, like his tongue is heavy like lead dragging hot against Michael's. Alarmingly, the feeling isn't any less when the kiss ends, but it's a little more manageable. Michael can breathe and think again, sort of. Enough to be aware of his dick, how Luke feels almost uncomfortably tight now that he isn't as hard. 

Michael lifts up, lets his dick slip out of Luke and cringes at the wet messy feeling of it. Luke looks away, his jaw set, teeth clenched. Michael can't read the expression, but he thinks it might have something to do with what he's done to him, come inside him. It probably feels weird and gross. He tried to use a condom. Luke wanted it. 

Michael extracts himself, settling close to Luke's side, but not on him. He can't help looking even though it's over now and he might not be allowed. His eyes flick down the length of Luke's body, taking in the drying come splattered up his skinny tummy, his long thighs and his cock lying spent, soft between them, his nipples pink and hard. Luke shivers and Michael watches as he breaks out in good bumps. 

“Cold,” Luke mumbles, curling in on himself a little. Michael almost lets out a sigh of relief. He's glad Luke's said something, he didn't want to be the first to speak. He's so grateful that he moves to tug up the blankets, tucks them around Luke's shoulders and then on second thought, snatches a handful of tissues up from the box beside the bed and reaches under the blankets to wipe at Luke's stomach. Luke blushes, his eyes flicking up to Michael's. “Thanks,” he says and smiles. 

Michael nods and screws up the tissues, chucks them across the room without aiming anywhere in particular and cuddles down on top of Luke, easier now that they have blankets and there's no visible come or nudity, it feels normal. They cuddle every night. 

“I should shower,” Luke mumbles. Michael shakes his head, rubbing his nose against Luke's shoulder, sneaks his hand across Luke's waist, stroking his warm skin as he curls his arm around him. “I'm all gross, I'll mess up the bed.” 

“Don't care,” Michael replies. He feels vulnerable, needy. He doesn't want Luke to get up or go away, ever, just stay there with him so he doesn't have to think about what it meant, how it made him feel. He closes his eyes, trying to fend off the mild panic he feels just contemplating thinking about it. “Housekeeping'll fix it.” 

“You're disgusting,” Luke says fondly. Michael hums appreciatively as Luke strokes his hair. 

“You love me,” he says without really thinking but he freezes as soon as his lips and tongue begin to form the word, and he definitely feels Luke's fingers hesitate in his hair, but it's just for a second. 

“I do,” Luke says and Michael's heart swells. He curls a little tighter against Luke, nuzzling against his throat to block out the light, to hide the smile he can't hold back against Luke's skin.

**Author's Note:**

> this is where i beg for comments because i'm an insecure loser!! but seriously, you should tell me what you liked if you liked it LOVE YOU :-* 
> 
> you can also reblog/read on tumblr [here.](http://cyclotomic.tumblr.com/post/70009593231/i-think-this-was-on-the-tropes-list-maybe-clemmings)


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